Regrets accepting art requests...

I think I mentioned(briefly) that I regretted taking art requests and here(after finishing most requests, leaving 2 more), gng ramble a bit on that:

 

I decided to do this on a whim after seeing artists doing them; wanted to give a try but who would hav thought it wasn't as fun as I thought it will be... 

Initial idea of requests was for me to try different art done by other ppl, exposing myself more. 

However, in the progress of doing, I started to lose the interest... 

First, most requests were drawing of OCs- I was hoping for some anime chars...-.- Next, I realised I hate drawing based on a particular work unless I chose it(rarely nowadays since I hate copying/sketching other ppl works...) and this bad trait of mine just breaks the idea of accepting requests...Sigh... Lastly, the expectations of another... While working, I can't help think abt how the party would feel; feel rather pressurised...

To add on, my copic... This is gng sound ugly but still gng say it: Nt only I lose the motivation to work on the requests but also that the colouring done use much of my copic & replenishment nid $$$(currently a bit broke...) I was gonna just give shaded works but seeing all the OCs given in colour, I felt bad only shading the works... 

But most of all the regrets r directed to a particular request... Tbh, I don't mind trying to draw; it's an unknown area that I love to try yet at the same time b'cos it's unknown, there's a chance that the art will be bad... As such, when the person requested it, I was tempted nt to do(since a request means the person trusted your ability to do that art well) but the person said he will help so I decided to give a try...

I wouldn't say it's hard but as someone who has no experiences, I feel I ref so much that I'm literally just sketching out the person's art & replace the head with the character I wan to draw... As said, I hate copying work; during the whole process of working on it, I'm so tempted to drop the work badly...But a promise is a promise- I will see it to its end.

And then, when I showed the person the draft, a few mistakes r pointed out and I'm just like... It's getting even more suffocating, working on this request as this week was particular busy with LL char bdays coming soon + the deadline of a particular contest is near... I was so tempted to say, 'f this shit' but I can't; it violates my character and belief...

So I ended up telling the person to leave it to me than pointing out the mistakes cos it's already... Annoying that there r changes to be made when I gt other urgent stuff to do- I was gng to just outline and work on my own but the person did say he wants to see so...

I suppose the person came at the wrong time, asking abt it?-It's my fault for putting it away long but really... I was gng put off the last 2 requests until June 13 when I'll be more free than now...(lucky that I didn't get the job...?)    

Sigh... If I had known this how accepting requests feel, I wouldn't hav done it...(Still gt another request asking for idm- had no idea y the past me thinks it will be alright to take that request...Gng be tough doing... Hoping the person don't come asking- better don't jinx it...)  This is likely my first & last attempt at getting requests. I'm just nt suited for this; just content drawing what I like~ 

I suppose the gd thing is that I get to 'know' more ppl(or rather gain more watchers?) and just this yr, first time having ppl wishing me on my bday on DA~ It was both a shock and surprise after being on DA for at least 7 years, this is the first~

That's just me rambling after that heavy chat(last sat) I had with the person over the draft- kinda my first(having a discussion over my artwork) so I was surprised when the person wanted a chat... 

Was debating whether to blog abt it but glad I did; felt a little better after venting out~ 

Update in the next post(this was gonna be an update post but didn't expect the rambles to be this long^^;)

This Yaiji signing off~

Yaiji~