[Updates] Trouble sleeping- Excitement? Anxiety?(A day before trip~)

Here's my last update before my trip~

Recently, I had been having bad sleeping 'habits'...

I've always been a night owl so I tend to sleep late and that's normal(at least for me; though I'm trying to sleep early so that I can adjust to working lifestyle...)

And naturally, you would wake up late cos you slept late...

However, lately, I had been sleeping late and waking up early, and resulting in me getting insufficent rest...

I do not know if it's cos of excitment or nervousness for the trip but I feel it's the latter...

Though it's gng be awesome knowing you're gng visit LLSS homeland(again), there's this... Fear(?) that things won't go smooth...

The goal/target of this trip is to collect all stamps. While planning was done to visit which area first and on which day, there is this... Anxiety that what if it don't work out as planned...

Maybe it's also cos of the trauma from last trip(where things were a mess despite reaching the goal...)

In addition, the recent weather in Japan wasn't good and this is one factor to consider as well...

Somehow, it's kinda funny that a trip is supposed to be enjoyable!

But I'm making it like some assignment and putting pressure on myself when I should be having fun there & not worrying here and there^^;

It's as my friend said, "it'll be fine" and yes, if I don't think it'll be fine then it won't... 

I mean if you don't believe in yourself, then you won't believe you can do it(even if others do believe in you...)

Okay, that was just my pathetic low self-esteem talking... 

And I feel that maybe it's not just the trip that I'm worrying about; there's also my first job that I'm starting soon... 

Think I mentioned in previous post, I'm worried I can't meet the expectations... 

Lazing around for the past few days made me feel that I'm being too relaxed and that I should be doing something to prepare for my job!- But what? I'm tempted to go brush up my programming skills again but not sure what languages will my job require...

There's also the fact that this is the last time I can be this relaxed; once start work, it's a 5-days per week routine of waking early for work, go home in the evening to rest before the cycle continues till the weekends for a break and resumes on Monday...

^Just thinking of such a life makes it boring and mundane(which is what I kinda experienced during my internship but minus the boring part for certain days...)

However, the need for $$$ makes this life worth to go for it... I guess?(actually that's a very sad way of looking at life but for now, there's how it is...)

Moving on, small update on my own personal work:

ChikaRiko 30-days challenge is still on-going and yesterday was the 25th day!(YAY) And I made a 2-parts special(due to bad planning and lack of inspiration)

Mentioned before, I will continue it while I'm on my trip- I mean it's kinda of the pt since I'm excited to draw some LLSS places with ChikaRiko~(I just hope I've the energy and time to, tho^^;)

Think I will do a shikishi for Yoshiko/Yohane bday- bought the boards from Daiso(to draw something for my friend's bday) and well, it comes with 3 in one packet^^

And that is all from me! 

See ya in about a week time! 

This is Yaiji signing off!

Yaiji~

[Updates] Job Offer(^^) and N3 Exam(-.-)

Following from my previous post; a day after the post, I actually got the call from the company!

And I'm confirmed for the job!!!(Yay!)

Currently, working on some pre-employment stuff and get them done before my trip so that I can start work in August!

That said, the getting-in/getting-the-job part may be done; the days after that will be the real challenge...

In a way, from getting through the interview to the company wanting you, is a sign that the company sees something in you, thus offered you.

However, despite knowing the job scope, the challenges ahead are blackboxes...

There is always this... Insecurity when starting something new and unfamiliar... And I'm the type that worries a lot of not able to meet expectations...

I don't see myself as anyone smart or capable; I'm just any average person or at least that's what I like to think of myself...Which sometimes isn't true(since I can perform badly while others are able to do the work easily...)
I don't exactly have much confidence or self-esteem in myself- I just tell myself to work hard and do my best so that I don't end up in regrets...

And this brings me to another matter I like to talk about: JLPT N3 Exam...

The exam was held yesterday and I kinda died from it...

I mean I know I'm not going to pass this with flying colours; judging from the questions I did in the assessment book... But I fear that a pass is gonna be hard-.-

I made a lot of mistakes, esp after the end of the vocab section(when I checked with a friend whom was in the same class as me in Jap 4- didn't know she was taking till I saw her walking to the exam venue, lol)

I suppose the sample practice papers I did gave a false image of 'doable'... Tbh, there is a bit of luck at play- Based on my knowledge, the level is in the middle of N3 and N4; when I try N4 questions, they were quite simple! However, N3 wise, it was a half-half thing...

Being able to read chinese characters help a bit but can also lead you astray(^^;)

All in all, I'm not confident of a pass but I tried my best or what I can do with the knowledge I have at hand(haha) Plus, it's over so all I can do is wait for the results and hope for the best~

Moving on... Another week before I fly!(can't wait~)

Will be trying to collect all the stamps in Numazu(let's hope I can find without problems..) and celebrate Yoshiko/Yohane bday! Feel like I should try going on each member's bday; went during Nozomi and Mari bday last year~

It's just too bad that Nico's bday is quite far apart from Yoshiko's...

In addition, will be going to the thanksgiving festival 2018 in Numazu!(RIP $$$)

So many things to do and look forward to- July will be a busy month but that's what make life interesting and fun~

Until next time, this is Yaiji signing off!

Yaiji~

PS: may do one last update before I fly(probably next week?) and the ChikaRiko challenge will continue even when I'm abroad(but I've no idea if I got time to draw-.-)

[Update] Frustration.....

Blogging to update a bit and vent some... Frustration out...

My part-time job ended last week and I had been going for job interviews for the past weeks.

And well, comparing to the ones I went before(during my school term), the companies seemed better, especially a particular one in which it's job scope is close to what I wanted and the location is good!- I'm hoping for the good news(but I'm not positive about it tho...)

This is where my frustration is; I had been to quite a fair bit of interviews(tho they are not many) and while they were good experiences, it sux not getting any offers so far...........Sigh...........

Tbh, I'm not exactly actively looking for a job yet due to my July trip; since I'm thinking of starting work in August... That said, it would be great to have a confirmed job which I can start in August- in that sense, I can go for my trip in peace and worry less~

But that will be too good to be true, huh?

Actually, I do have an ambiguous offer from a company... Ambiguous in the sense that they sent an email saying the interview outcome was positive and now working on the recuitment process... But that was 2 weeks ago-.- And my friend whom also got this status from the company, received a call from the company this week while I don't... I'm thinking maybe the recuitment process did not work out well... Sigh...

Currently, I'm just waiting for the one that I mentioned earlier which I liked. Judging from the amount of failures... I'm not really positive about the outcome(esp after the one I went last week, didn't reply even though they said they would, regardless of the outcome... I take it that it was a fail; I mean if it went well, they would definitely reply. Else, there is no point...It hurts just thinking about it... And I kept checking my email everyday this week...)

And that's my current pathetic life... At least I have things to keep me occupied; my N3 jap exam which I'm starting to feel less confident about it(after doing the assessment...) and my July trip!

In addition, I'm working on a 30-days challenge of drawing ChikaRiko moments since last week, 16 June 2018~
This challenge is just me drawing one ChikaRiko moment per day in a span of 30 days!- with a theme in mind:)
And to make things interesting, I decided to make manga ver(vertical/portrait) and illustration ver(horizontal/landscape) in rotation; example, if day 1 was manga, day 2 would be illustration!

Will be uploading everyday onto my insta-story or twitter!

That is all. This post is mainly to pen my thoughts and reflect on my recent job-finding experience...

Likely to update again before I fly~

Until next time, this is Yaiji signing off!

Yaiji~ 
 
PS: It doesn't help that friends around you already got a job while you don't...

[Updates] Aqours POV series~

Finally, finished this series last week and I've already uploaded the full work onto the various platforms; | Pixiv | Deviantart | Twitter | Instagram |

And, I compiled the series into a book; here's a showcase of it:

Music used: Kiseki Hikaru by Aqours

^Lovely song; can't wait for the full ver!

Artist's notes:

This series first started off with Riko's POV as a work done for Inktober 2017 and was inspired by Athyra's Love Live Sunshine x Harry Potter Crossover.

After that, I went on to expand it by working on You's POV as another Inktober work, and then Chika's as well!

Intending to stop at 2nd yrs(my fave trio~), I felt it was a waste; plus I was having fun, thinking of the various ideas of each member's POV!

Yoshiko's POV was long thought of when I decided to expand even more. As for Hanamaru's POV, didn't have inspiration until I started from one panel and one led to another- I must say I love Hanamaru's the most due to how the panels flow!

Initially, Ruby's POV would link as a continum to Dia's POV... However, somehow... Even though I've the idea in my head, I couldn't draw them-.-

I made do with another way to illustrate the idea behind Ruby's POV~ Dia's POV would be confusing if not for the last POV I did in colour; showing the link that Dia can't see the hut but Riko can...

Next, the last two POV were somewhat hard cos I didn't have an idea of what type of roles to give them... For Kanan's POV, it was similar to Hanamaru's; ideas came while drawing:) I had Mari's POV to show the concept of flying by broom. As the 'last' POV, I tried to tie up the series by showing more of that fateful night/incident...

Lastly, the special POV; as mentioned, it was to show the relation of Dia's POV! It was also to introduce the mysterious character called 'Yocchan'(tbh, it isn't mysterious if you know this nickname given) whom Riko knew(and is afraid of...)

Background:

Here's a bit of the background(since it's likely I won't be expanding any further than these...)

Sakurauchi Riko is just any average teenager until she was introduced to the world of magic(by Yocchan) and attended the school of magic. 

At there, she met Aqours members and became friends with them and maybe closer to some...?(as seen from the POVs;)

This new life seemed great to Riko that she wouldn't want to return(to her old life) until that incident...

The incident where she trusted the wrong person and in the process, her two important friends, Chika and You, were mentally cripped by one of the unforgiven curses, crucio...

To save whatever was left of their sanities, Riko had to erase their memories and that also meant Chika and You losing their memories of her...

This series of POV was the aftermath of that incident and showed how each character was coping with it; whether they were involved and if they were, directly or indirectly...

In this series/AU, each work was done with the idea that Riko is the main character or the focus and showing her interactions and relations with the other Aqours members!

Some thoughts; possible ending...

I was thinking along the line that Riko tried to do what she can to amend her mistakes; like fighting against Yocchan... And in order to beat Yocchan, she had to use up all her magic... She would mean she would no longer be a mage/wizard after that... 

And she would say, "maybe this is how it should; I, who was just a normal, average teenager, should have just stay normal than trying to be special... Maybe this is my punishment for wanting more..." with a smile before using up her magic(which was granted by Yocchan) to defeat Yocchan; like as if Riko's returning everything back to Yocchan and going back to her old life...

At least, that's how I thought it would end- Something like Bleach(which Bleach should have ended there than expanding further...) But, it's really up to readers' interpretation and imagination~ 

Afterwords

As much as I love to work on this series more, I'm afraid of my tendency to go hiatus halfway and lost my inspiration later(which happened to some work series I have...currently...)

Plus I will be working soon so this means less time to draw...(and I should try settle Random Doodles X Love Live before then...)

Oh and before I forget, it's not much(but it is to me, lol); this work got into pixiv ranking!!!

Refer to this LINK for the ranking page!

I was quite surprised and like to thank everyone for the support!!!XDDDD

That is all. Currently, working part-time while (kinda of) studying for JLPT N3 before my trip in July!- Can't wait(>^<)

This is Yaiji, signing off!

Yaiji~ 

[Updates] CONFIRMED GRADUATE!!! YAY!!!

Today was the release of results which I only found out today(lol); thinking it was tomorrow instead^^;

Truthfully... I was scared and worried for this particular module that I had no confident of, after walking out of the exam hall... All I hoped was a pass(so that I can graduate in peace; wouldn't want to be retained, just b'cos of this one module...)
Well, it was really a pass(or rather in my standard since it's the lowest grade I ever gotten; a C+) so in a way I'm 'glad'

That said, I was surprised by the overall gpa; I mean you would expect a drop, seeing as there was a C but instead it improved... And that raise was all thanked to my FYP!XD

The thing about University is that Academic Unit or AU is responsible for the percentage or weightage of one's gpa while the grade would be the base value...
In other words, if you did damm well on this high AU module of let's say 8AU and got an A, you're sure your gpa will raise if your current GPA is in the B range despite your other modules cos it's good enough to cancel the negatives~

And that was my situation so overall, I'm satisfied:)

That's one worry gone; left one more of finding a job which I had been going for interviews and stuff but still at zero... Tbh, I'm not exactly in a rush to find since I can only start working in August... Currently, I'm working part-time to help fund a bit of my July graduate trip~
Plus I'm taking JLPT N3 in the coming July 1st(hoping it won't be too hard like my Jap 5...)

And that's about it- was elated by my results and can't helped blog! Can't wait for convocation and throw my graduation hat up high!

This is Yaiji signing off!

Yaiji~ 

PS: will be doing another update for the finished series, [Aqours] POV and explain in more details of this AU!